God surprised me anyway.  Somehow, in the very quiet moment between my fear and faith, I felt the urge to let it all go.  I gave up looking for the rationale for my circumstances.  “Okay, Lord, I’ve tried to do it all on my own.  Here’s my life, my hopes, my dreams, my fears.  Would you please take me and lead me?  Would you help me rest in you?”

That’s all that I had to ask.   The rest is a story of peace.

Hmmm. How about helping a homeless child and his family find a place to sleep tonight?  What about helping a homeless woman as she participates in a transitional residential program?  You could help her develop the lifelong skills that she needs to become a contributing member of our community.

 Join me at Family Promise of NewRock and Light House Village.  Click on the links to find out more.  

God is doing some incredible work here in Conyers.  Light House Village is located at Sigman Road here in Conyers.  Our campus is developing specialized resources for those who need transitional care: Haven House, Phoenix Pass and Dream House.  visit www.lighthousevillage.org

I have been too serious lately.  I didn’t even notice it until someone told a funny joke.  My face felt funny as I laughed. Really, my smile felt foreign. 

I had been walking around, going through my routines, without even cracking a smile.  I probably looked like Eyeore from Winne the Pooh.  I can just replay the scene in my mind.  “Oh well, “  I would moan.  “I guess I should be thankful that my house isn’t flooded.  Sure did seem like a lot of water, though.”

 So, I stepped over to the mirror and looked.  Yikes!  I wonder if I even smiled today.   It wasn’t as if things were all that bad. It was just that I had become busy, crossing tasks off my “to do” list.  I hadn’t even taken time to enjoy my kindergartners’ giggles or the brilliant afternoon sunshine.

Goodness gracious.  How in the world can I communicate my love for Jesus if I go around complaining?  How can I feel God’s presence when I focus more on my  “to-do” list and forget who I’m created “to be?”

I’m going to go check out one of those Junie B. Jones books from the library.  This afternoon, I’m going to take some time out to laugh.  Who knows? Maybe, I’ll even laugh out loud.

“In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven.” (Matt 5:16 NIV)

Sure, I was ready to venture down our hill. Ease up on the brake. This thing is in neutral. No problem, all that I have to do is move that stick and mash those pedals.

Not quite a NASA launch, I pressed one thing and pushed something else. A wretched sound generously broadcast its way through the neighborhood. Vibrations climbed from the floorboard. I’m sure that a crowd gathered. Our car hadn’t even moved. Calm quickly flew into panic. As soon as Dan could take over the controls, I hopped out, never to try again. To this day, he still jokes about how I almost ruined his transmission trying to shift out of neutral. My only defense is that I told him that I don’t understand anything about gears and gadgets. I’m still trying to figure out how to operate my ten speed bike.

It made me wonder. How many times do I get stuck in my life? How many times have I tried to make something work my way? When it didn’t go well, how often did I quit? I’m sure that I have missed many opportunities.

Maybe before I jump on the next journey and claim that I’m following God’s will, I need to be still and listen. I’m sure that if I did, I’d be able to steer.

“My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me.” (Joh 10:27 NIV, NAB)

Recently, I’ve been blessed to meet several people who are heading out on missionary trips. Their destinations are New Orleans, Haiti, and Kenya. I wonder if I ever could do anything so significant for God. I don’t have their talents, skills or physical stamina. What could I do?

“Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God’s grace in its various forms.” (1 Peter 4:10 NAB, NIV)

I don’t have to pack any tools, medical supplies or building materials for a trip overseas. If I make myself available to serve, God will use me right here.

Dear God, thank you for your infinite wisdom. Please keep prompting me to give.

But none of that mattered as I walked across the stage to accept my diploma.  Out of the corner of my eye, I could see my parents’ smiles.  When the ceremony was over, I couldn’t wait to see them.  Mom and Dad wrapped me in hugs. “Great job, we’re so proud of you….this is such a big day,” they gushed.

 In one of Jesus’ parables, four servants were given talents, but only one servant pleased his master.

“Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master’s happiness!”  (Matt 24:21 NIV, NAB)

Someday, I will hear my name called again. As I stand before God, my creator, what will he say to me?

Dear God,

You are so holy.  Sometimes, it seems impossible to serve you without failing.  Thank you for sending your precious son, Jesus Christ.  Please keep teaching me how to walk closely with you.

Although more than a couple of years have passed since those carefree days, I still kick into superhero overdrive when a friend is swamped in tragedy.

I rush in to see what I can fix. If I can find the right person with the miracle, I’m just sure that the pain will disappear. Everything will be back to normal. On top of that, when I’m really on a roll, I’ll even say something foolish. I’ll fill the silence with what I think that my friend needs to hear.

One thing is for certain. None of my pat answers will ever allow me to hear the heart of someone who is hurting. Sometimes, all someone wants is our presence.   It’s hard to fight a battle alone. Once you realize that there’s a whole army supporting you, hope is renewed.

Last night, thousands of cancer survivors and supporters circled the track at our own horse park. Arm in arm, they marched on through the night. And, as some of them bumped into acquaintances that were new to the cancer battle, they listened. No capes were needed. Life events like these call for a different dress code.

“Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.” (Col 3: 12 NAB, NIV)

It’s time for me to put my cape back in the toy box. Instead, I need to use my heart to listen.

My husband, seven year old son and I were all strapped together on the edge of a speedboat zooming over 50 miles per hour. As the rope and sails hoisted us up 700 feet above the Atlantic, we saw the endless ocean. It was so beautiful. Then I looked down at the skipper and his mate. I felt a huge lump in my throat as I realized that we didn’t know too much about this “dynamic duo.” They looked so young. I couldn’t believe that we had put our life in their hands. We were literally flying by the seat of our pants.

Of course, the worrywart self that I am, I calmed down just long enough to enjoy the view and make it back to the boat (and yes, I did kiss the ground).

Whoops, how many times have I just gone ahead and done something in good faith and then found myself in a predicament? What if I had taken time to pray, research and reflect on more of my big decisions? What if instead of a quick prayer to consult God, I patiently waited for his response? Would I enjoy more peace and less fear? Was I ready to move into a deeper, more trusting, relationship with the Lord?

Sometimes it’s so hard to trust a God that I can’t see. I get tired from this whole thing that we call life. Once in a while, it even feels as though I’m flying solo.

It’s a good thing that faith doesn’t rely on fluctuating feelings. God is still God. He is always with me.

Ps 31:14 “(But) I trust in you, O Lord; I say, You are my God.”

Dear Lord, please guide me to love others the way that you do.